Posted in Love

Khabar | Urdu | Poetry | Nazm

Teri khidkiyo se hawa takra k laut jati h,

Tu zulf dhoop me ab sukhaata nhi.

Andhero me doobi hui h duniya,

Tu khul k ab khilkhilaata nhi.

Mitti me ab wo khushboo nhi h,

Tu barisho me ab chhat pe aata nhi.

Meri kabr bohot maayus h, humdum,

Mausam ab teri khabar lata nhi.

______________________

Translation:

Breeze knocks on your windows and returns,

You stopped drying your hair in the sun.

The world is slowly drowning in dark,

Awaiting your laughter to bring the spark.

The ground does not hold its familiar fragrance.

Don’t you step on roof now when it the rains?

My grave is gloomy and desolate, love.

The seasons don’t bring your tidings now.


Authors Note: A Nazm is a piece of Urdu poetry that is made of several quartets, each carrying the same thought.

Posted in Love

Qabiz | Urdu | Poetry

Ek kamzarf Lubna thi qabiz wajood-e-Kais pe,

Humko BaKhuda kar de, hume bhi ishq karna hai.


A powerless Lubna permeated Kais until he ceased to be.

Permeat me, my Lord—I, too, want to love.


Author’s note:

“BaKhuda” actually means, “I swear by Allah (Khuda)”.

But “Ba” in Urdu means “permeated with” and “Khud” means “self”. Hence, I have used the word differently to mean “fill with Yourself”.


The story of Lubna and Kais is one of the most famous love stories in Urdu poetry, as Kissa-e-Laila-Majnun.

A very handsome man called Kais fell in love with Lubna who was very plain and dark as night (Laila). People were surprised at the match. At that time, the Arab law was against love marriages. They were separated. But Kais lost himself completely and was called Majnun (mad). When he found that his Laila has died of long suffering, he searched for her grave and died next to her—not because of the heartbreak but because of the ecstasy of finally finding her. Thus, they became one.

It is said that on the day of judgement, Allah will present Majnun to the mankind as the epitome of love and ask everyone why no one loved Him as much as Kais loved Lubna.

A question every woman asks her man…Sigh!

Posted in Love

Hawain (Breeze) | Urdu | Poetry

Jo chhod aaye the baad-e-naseem mashriq me jane ko,

Surkh khursheed ke phoolo se sehera khilane ko,

Laut aaye hain gulistan me sukoon pane ko,

Kehte hain hawao ne unka sath nhi diya.

*****

Tapish-e-shams se jab parwaz khak ho gye,

Au’ hauslo k angaar tufaano me bujh gye,

Bujhi hui mohabbat ki shama jalane ko,

Laut aaye hain gulistan me sukoon pane ko,

Kehte hain hawao ne unka sath nhi diya.


English Translation:

He who turned his boat to east

Leaving breeze of west grieving

To fill the desert with the

flowers of the blushing sun,

has returned to the garden

to seek the lost devotion.

He blames the breeze

had pushed his boat away.

*****

When the fiery sun

burnt his wings to ash

and the storms blew out

the embers within,

He returned to light

the candles of love again,

has returned to the garden

to seek the lost devotion.

He blames the beeeze

had pushed him away.


Author’s note: A Nazm is an Urdu poetry style where the same thought is followed in each quartet. Mine is a short and rather imprecise version since this is my first attempt.

Like most Urdu poetry, this one has dual reference where breeze of west or baad-e-naseem is considered as female. It also means the wind that comes from Mecca.


Posted in Life and After, Love

The Bell

First line offered by Marina Osipova

The doorbell rang with shrill urgency. I opened the door yet again. No one was there.

Of course, it would be so. My doorbell was having a day. Nothing I did or said could make her let go off her fear. With all the anxiety, she was close to having a cog attack and I wondered if I should get her checked by a professional. Of course, they wouldn’t really understand the problem. They’ll just open her up, oil her, double check her wires for any cuts and, then, return with a suggestion of buying a new, more reliable door bell. And there lay the problem.

May, my girlfriend, had suggested just the thing earlier that day insisting that my doorbell never rang whenever she pressed the button. She believed the thing had a faulty wiring. Well, in a way she was right. It is wired to my jealous dead-wife’s soul.

When alive, my wife would call my office landline under various pretexts to check I was really there and follow me in her car when I was too cheery about the weekend fishing with my friends. But it was nothing compared to now.

Ever since she died, I felt I wasn’t alone; that I was being watched. I would glance over my shoulder so frequently, I had kinks in my neck every now and then.

When a few months later, I mentioned it to a friend, he suggested that the loneliness was probably getting at me. He set up a blind date with his cousin, May.

Once I reached the venue for the date, my car door wouldn’t open. I had to get out by breaking a window. A few weeks later, when my car failed to start every time I planned a date with her, I sold it and bought a new one but the problem continued and I could see a pattern forming. I started calling May to pick me up instead. It was then that my cellphone stopped working whenever I called her or she called me.

I could clearly see the issue now. The feeling of being watched was intense. I craved being left alone. Desperate to get out of the horror show that my life had become, I requested a witch doctor for help. He was quite understanding, having once suffered similar pain (Not my story to tell). He offered to cage my late wife inside a house fixture and asked me to choose one. I didn’t want her shaking the walls or bringing down the pillars, nor did I want lampposts falling on my head or door handles getting stuck. So, I chose the doorbell, which was out of the way, believing it would cause me the least distress.

Well, so we are here now. The felling of being watched is less intense and limited to the area around the doorbell. But ever since my girlfriend’s mention of a new bell, my doorbell has been ringing frantically every five minutes, demanding my presence. All coddling and reasoning have failed. Frustrated in extreme with the constant ringing that kicks up my heart rate and bring my blood to boil, I finally chuck the doorbell out of the door to be rid of her forever. She can spend the rest of her time in a landfill or, maybe, a recycling plant until the day of judgement.

It is quiet now. The feeling of being watched is gone and I am truly alone. I had believed I would revel in the alone-ness, but weirdly enough, I miss it. I look outside and think of my erratic wife lying outside in the snow. True that she couldn’t feel the elements anymore but still…she loves me, even if a little too much. And I still love her, even if she is being insufferable now a days.

Half an hour later, I still can’t get away from the window, watching her protectively. Car headlights flash ahead. What if it crushes her? I rush outside and pick the doorbell up from the freezing road and bring her back in where it is warm. Placing her on the table, I hear her ring without the wiring; a faint call, reminding she was still there. It is time for tough decisions.

I call May one last time and break up with her. Then I pull off the enchanted rope that the witch doctor had used to tie my wife to the doorbell.

The feeling of being watched is back.

I’m not lonely anymore.

Posted in Life and After, Love

Karwachauth

She sat waiting for him to return home. It was Karwachauth fast, so she was thirsty, hungry and crabby. She was also annoyed that seven years after their marriage, he would choose to ignore the day. He hadn’t called all day. Neither had he come home a little early like he did in the earlier days of their marriage.

It was almost time for the moon to rise, for her to break the fast, but she couldn’t eat or drink until he fed her with his own hands. She wondered if it was worth staying hungry for the long life of a man who didn’t give a damn anymore.

He was all work now, always at office, only returning to eat and sleep. Sometimes, he would play a little with the children but he didn’t have time for her anymore. Did it have something to do with that new pretty girl in his office, Priya? That day at the office party, she seemed too intent to please. Always hovering around him, “Sir this…”, “Sir that…”.

What would she do if he decided to ditch their marriage for this one? She worried with the lace of her red sari–one she had worn for too many years on too many Karwachauth fasts. It was the only decent red sari she had, the colour she had to wear as per the tradition. She hadn’t asked for another. It seemed weird asking for a red dress at her age. That too for just one occasion an year. Not that he noticed anymore anyway.

The bell rang, she almost ran to the door but collected herself together. She didn’t want to look desperate, so she called one of the kids to open the door.

Her husband walked in with a large package in his hand, which he handed to her with a sheepish smile. “Sorry, I’m late. You know how tailors can be. I had to sit there and wait until he finished. I could have called you but I wanted it to be a surprise. You already look lovely, but this shade suits you better.”

She opened the package. It was the perfect red sari ensemble.

Posted in Random Thoughts

Sahil | Poetry | Urdu to English

Na raah h, na rehbar h, na koi sitara h.

Is raahi ko toh bas Samandar ka hi sahara h.

Jo kashti h, jo toofan h, wo hi kinara h.


No path, no rose, no north star,

I drift around, at Sea, that is too

the Boat, the Storm, the Shore afar.


Author’s note: He is the journey and the destination.

Urdu poetry is rich in duel meaning, one of which almost always divine.

Posted in Life and After

The Sadist

First line suggested by Lucinda E Clarke

Tomorrow I am going to kill Caroline, but I can’t decide how to take her life away.

I can always bite her head off…the thought was repulsive, so obviously, I relished it. I run through the scene in my mind where I bite off different parts of her head one-by-one, leaving the nose, of course, since she has an allergy which keeps her nose permanently runny.

But honestly, once I bite any part of her, she would snap and throw me out of the room. I need a more plausible scenario. Maybe I’ll pick up a fight with that mad dog in the backstreet to get rabies and then bite her.

But what’s the point of revenge if I don’t live to enjoy it? I rake my brains again. What if I push her overboard when she offers to take me on a flight around the place? I’ll make sure she lands on something hard.

But then, who will steer? I hardly have the physical faculties needed for a safe landing. Well, maybe I’ll just bite off the twigs from her broomstick and then decline to go with her. Then her broomstick will surely crash and Dad will never go on a date with her. And he will never forget to feed me…

How could he forget to feed me? An overwhelming sadness engulfs me that has nothing to do with food and everything to do with losing the only man I ever loved…

The soft click of the window handle startles me. Dad glides in on his broomstick. But, how? He was only gone 15 minutes. Didn’t he say he’ll be out all night? Not that I’m complaining…

He pours kibbles and fresh fish in my bowl and then he pets me, “Really sorry, darling. I just remembered. Caroline sent me right back and told me hug you for her too.” He hugs me and leaves on his broomstick again.

Maybe I’ll let Caroline live after all!

Posted in Love

Not Me | Haiku

Sun rains down not kindly.

I plough through life as not me

‘Cause you love not me.


Authors note: A Haiku is a three-line Japanese poetry with 5,7,5 syllables. It contains a reference to nature.

Posted in Life and After

60 Feet Under

Author’s note: This is short story based on the first line suggested by Beetleypete.

It was so hot there, much hotter than I could ever have imagined it would be. I had always expected it to be cool below the surface since the desert sun couldn’t get to you. But apparently, I was wrong.

It was stifling hot and suffocating, even though, I didn’t need to breath anymore. The casket I was lying in was rather stuffy. May be a walk in the tomb would help.

It was just as dark outside. There was no way of knowing whether it was day or night. Who would want to live for eternity stuck in a hole where you could see neither the sun, nor the moon and stars. Not that I needed light to see. My eyes adjusted to the dark just fine but it didn’t take away the claustrophobia, reminding of the one time I had been foolish enough to hide in a closet.

The paintings on the walls depicted my life in the world outside–my wife, sons and daughters, my territory and the time of my glorious reign. As if I needed a reminder of that now! I already thought of it all the time. The other paintings were decorative and I had already memorised every single line from the countless lonely walks in the past years.

The bandages on my body were making me itchy. I wished I had my wife to scratch out that itch on my back but she was still out there, alive. Sigh! I will have to wait until she is done with her time on the surface until she is lowered here with me. If she chooses to sleep in the same tomb as me…Not sure she would. I wasn’t a model husband–too many mistresses to make her jealous.

She wasn’t allowed to have another husband to get even with me but what if she took a slave? Did she do that while I was still alive? With the dark one with the tall soldier-like build–the one she had chosen to keep when we were sifting through the war prisoners? In my mind, I could see the longing in her eyes for the tall monstrosity who became her personal guard and the knowing smirk on the guard’s face when he had leaned on one knee and kissed her knuckles.

I wanted to throw my fists through the walls. If I had a heart anymore, it would have burst with the pain. You would think that, with an eternity to brood, I would accept fate but, with an eternity to brood, the thoughts kept coming back. Like the day our last child was born–the child was darker than usual. The pain of deception had cut me through. It was one thing for me to sleep with another woman but to find out that my wife was doing another man…

When I had voiced my doubt, she had cried her heart out, reminding me of my own many indiscretions and fainted in her bed. I was aghast. I knew what she had done. I should have ordered their beheading right then. But here I was sitting in her bed, holding her hand, feeling guilty, waiting for her to wake up. Not sure when I fell asleep too. The choking sensation had had me reeling.

I wondered if he helped her or she did it on her own…

I wondered if she cried for me at all…

I woke up inside the casket in the tomb. It was so hot there, much hotter than I could ever imagine. I had always expected it to be cool below the surface since the desert sun couldn’t get to you. But apparently, I was wrong. The bandages were itchy and I wished I had my wife…