Hook, Line, Sinker

After years of being a dog person, I finally fell in love with a cat who broke my heart. (Check out my post My Neighbour: The Queen to find out about this drama.) Deciding that I didn’t want to be treated as an automatic scratch-post, I decided to never get anywhere close to anything feline.

That is why when my brother in law brought in another kitten to foster, I kept my distance and didn’t go anywhere near her for one very long night. The fact that my fingers itched to touch her was warning enough. But the next day, I had to run interference since she wasn’t eating or drinking anything.

I am not a kitten expert but this one is Tiny with a capital T. She is a little bigger than the size of my palm. The guy who gave her to us took her from the litter when she was less than a month. She is a month old now. It felt like the time I held my daughter for the first time. She was so delicate I was afraid to hurt her. One look from her doll-face and I fell. Hard.

Ever since then, I had been trying to keep my distance, all the while telling my brother-in-law to send her back to her mother (can’t happen since they are in another state) and check what to feed her before feeding it to her. Apparently, the guy who had gave her to us was feeding her Buffalo’s milk with chocolate syrup so that she would eat something since she wasn’t. And she can’t digest it. Now, this fostering between her supplier and next forever home feels like a rescue mission. My brother-in-law has consulted people who know kitty stuff and I’m hoping he has finally got it right.

Because if he hasn’t, I might not be able to deal with the loss.

All the while I have been avoiding her, she has been claiming a part of my heart. I have been visiting her on the pretext on accompanying my daughter. Everyone here knows I am bluffing but they have enough sense not to call me out. When I go, I watch her quietly as she plays with her ball. I sometimes push the ball around to draw her out to give her a chance to attack it. That’s the extent of it. But my eyes never leave her.

I think she prefers me that way.

Because yesterday, when I was sitting on the bed watching her eat, she quietly came to me and climbed on my leg into my lap and sat there. Just sat there. And ignored my daughter who actually came to play. My daughter kept on patting her own lap, inviting her to play, twirling her fingers to catch her attention, while Coco sat chewing and licking my fingers in one hand while I stroked her with the other hand.

And I fell in love.

And she isn’t mine. She belongs to her forever family. She will only be here for this month, if that.

Well, what can I say? It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. Sigh!