A few months back, I wrote about how, last winter, I started on a crazy reading schedule and couldn’t stop myself until, finally, I put my foot (read ‘book’) down. I deleted Kindle and Google Book apps from my phone and limited my time on Project Gutenberg. Since then I was following a sustainable speed of one book a month so that I could spend time with my daughter.
Last month, I decided to read something lighter and downloaded Google Books again. As it happens with all libraries that do not solely contain classics, I had a few hit and miss cases, which meant that I was reading books I didn’t like and then moving on to the next one to “wash out the taste from my mouth”. I read two short stories and two book samples before settling on a series which was interesting. It was four book combo and I read it in three days. Then, I realised that I really like it and read it again a little slowly. And now I am reading it for the third time to understand how the writer has done the charater study. And I am halfway through again.
That’s 10 books in 10 days. Since I work part-time during days and am full-time mother, needless to say I am sleeping…two-three hours a day. And I can see the dark bags under my eyes and irritation seeping in and I have that craving to go back to the book again.
I relapsed.
This morning, I decided to take a step back and see where it was taking me. I have a pounding headache–the kind associated with hangover after heavy partying. I have had it for the last one month.
I haven’t combed my hair in three days and hadn’t offered my daily prayers. I hadn’t talked to anyone outside work, not even my mother. I haven’t posted in the past two months. While first month was excusable due to my daughters exams and bad health and my work pressure, second one wasn’t.
My house has clothes littered all over the place. The kitchen is a mess because I am not even helping with the minimal household chores that I usually do before I start office work. My mom-in-law hasn’t said a thing and it makes me more ashamed than any kind of reprimand.
Until yesterday, I didn’t know what my daughter ate for lunch. My sister-in-law has been feeding her, assuming I was busy with office work. I don’t what my daughter had been studying lately and whether she had finished her homework, and I hadn’t played with her all month.
I am ashamed and yet the craving of going back to my book is overwhelming. I have to stop it here and now. So, I am starting today.
I spent my time after office by gossipping with my mom-in-law while helping in kitchen a bit. I came back to help my daughter with her homework. She was delighted and ready to forgive and forget.
I still have the headache and am sleepy and a little dizzy. But I think I will be able to contain the damage to my health in a couple of days. Damage to my reputation amongst family and friends, not sure. I haven’t wished Happy Birthday to a bunch of them and almost missed my husband’s birthday, my brother-in-law’s anniversary which are both in a couple of days.
I also missed out wishing everyone on Christmas. Apologies! I hope you got what you asked Santa for 😊 Happy Holidays everyone! I wish we will all be able to keep our new year resolutions.
Mine is to contain my book enthusiasm to one book a month. Wish me luck!
And what’s yours?